lost

Today i am feeling down and lost and confused. Tomorrow i have an interview in HK TST for Insurance Selling and i know it's not what i want. Nor something i want to make a career out of, but i am going to experience interviews in HK. As i want to try and find a job out here.

But i am faced with this corner at the end of the road, and i don't know where or what i want my career to be in. I don't know what i'd enjoy or want other than the fact to enjoy the job and be good at it. I dream of something more creative, but can not find a happy medium of what kind of creative-ness it could be. I lack in Chinese grammar and vocal Mandarin, so far luck is not on my side since all jobs require these necessities.

Perhaps i should work to live and forget living to work....a career is possibly over-rated. I don't know.

For those who have a path, dream and goal and focus, i envy you. Every step i take, is a step full of doubts - and worry that i'm going off course  - but i don't even know what course i want to take, thats the hilarious part.

Paris

26th-28th Jan 2007

My sweet boyfriend brought me a ticket to Paris for Christmas (to go with him of course...having just one single ticket to Paris by myself just wouldn't be the same). When compared to his last Christmas present (a CD holder for the sun visor of a car - the most useful present any girlfriend could get for Christmas) i would say it was a SIGNIFICANT improvement!

Anyhow, the trip was great even though it was a early flight! Everything went according to plan: we went sightseeing, we had amazing dinners and cocktails, we had a great (though small) hotel, mastered the Paris metro systems and even got to see Disneyland.

Day 1: Mission - Site seeing

(Paris by day, Gare Du Nord - train station, Effiel Tower, Effiel from above at the Monteparnasse building, Luke on the 29th floor of Monteparnasse, it's an amazing 207 Metres high!,Lourve by day, By the main building, Luke's really cold!, Luke's main job-map reading!, Notre Dame by day, inside notre dame. Main meal - Oysters and beers! Yum.

Last pic: Louvre by night - amazing sight.)

Day 2: shopping and more sightseeing!

(Sacre-Couer at Montremont, Mandy&Luke at the steps over Paris, Luke picking at a spot at the Metro stations! (haha), Centre George Pompidou, Some Korean buskers outside the centre, Mechanical building - Arab Institute, Eiffel Tower at night, Luke and his choco crepe at night, Mandy with Louis Vitton, Arc de Triomphe at night, Moulin Rouge, Luke's famous French Onion soup and my snails!!!)

Day 3: DISNEYLAND PARIS

(Mandy outside Sleeping Beauty's castle, Luke is map reading again, Aladdin's Castle, Aladdin's Caves, Belle on parade, Luke by the Pirate's boat, Mandy with a tasty toffee apple, Getting lost Alice in Wonderland maze, Mandy&Luke on the boat ride, My first 3D show of "Honey i strunk the audience", at the Mickey on Ice show.

Last pic: Minnie&Mickey on Ice)

Thank-You babba for such a great weekend...

even though my car got a flat battery and we had to wait for 2 hours for the AA to come...ZZZzzzzzz - then got snapped by the speed camera >.<

A-La-Luke-Suprise

Hippodrome Bristol - CATS!

Many people have said to me before, don't expect a white english man to be attentive, really loving, and full of suprises. And to an extent, this is very true, especially when compared to Chinese boys. Chinese lads have been brought up to really put effort into the "chase" to think out of the box when it comes to presents. To make suprises which comprise of lots of effort and are more willing to dump a load of cash to sneak a smile on your face.

White english guys (myself owning one!) are not so much...but how differently have they been brought up? Have our chinese men just been watching too much TVB instead of BBC when growing up? haha.

But whilst i was having one of my usual digs at him for not being full of suprises enough, he takes to see CATS in Bristol. Though i've never been to the theatre before. i really enjoyed it.

I think white guys can be just as good as chinese dudes at this game....just my one needs a bit more coaching and guidance.....

Couples and the opposite sex?

This one is a bit odd...the situation is that i revitalised an old friendship with a college friend of mine called Cab. But i never really knew him at college, it was one of those - who you knew of. But we never really got to know each other. Anyhow, a few months ago - i went to the Carvery in town and he was there with his friends. So we got talking.

Then the next week following, i saw him at Weatherspoons when i was out eating with a friend, then a month after that i saw him in the club when i was celebrating a friend's birthday.

So we exchanged numbers to catch up and be friends and that is what we are.

Now, the boyfriend is finding it a little odd, how i am now going out to the Cinema with Cab and to dinner. Is this odd? Just because the boyfriend doesn't know the friend, does it make it odd, so much that i shouldn't be going out with Cab to see films, dinner etc? The boyfriend's arguement is that, if he wore the shoe was going out with a girl purely as friends to see films etc. that i wouldn't see or be as tolerant as he is with me. I'm not sure if this is true...i haven't figured it out but i can see his point.

For me, its more about how rare it is for me to find a true friend who i can "kill" time with - who won't find me high maintenance who i can get on with. As i've gone through college, then uni and now working, a lot of close friends have never been physically close by to always meet up etc. A lot of friends who were close by have since moved or drifted apart.

So, is there such a crime that you can not be expected to make friends with the opposite sex when you're in a relationship? Especially if the other half does not know the new friend too? Are you able to meet same sex friends and do "friendly" things with them but not the opposite?

Why one rule for one and one for the other?

I am not saying my boyfriend is wrong because i can see his point as i would probably be the same with him if the situation was reversed.

So what should i do?

Birthday!

Hi!

Wow it's that time again! May...i must admit i love May now...no more revision...no more coursework - let alone dissertation crap to do or stress over like i did last year.

I actually think i may enjoy this years birthday - you see the problem with my birthday is that is on 20th may. That is always heavy exam time. Since i was like 15years old, i've never enjoyed a birthday without stress, exam or revision - and i'm turning 22 this year!!!

But the only downside is that my beloved ginger-man is still in finals...so he won't be able to properly spoil me and love me on my birthday! But we are doing something in advance for it on the 17th....*smiles*...which should be good, but i am going to list my "loves" and "wants" below - in case he needs to make my brithday extra special!!! Hint hint.

Loves:

* Chloe paddington handbag -medium size, pink/tan/grey-blue

* Estee Lauder skin refinisher (this is more like a neccessity nowadays)

* Gucci II perfume (I tried it at Hong Kong for the first time and it's luuushh!)

* "Roxanne" Darwin Mulberry handbag - saw it in Loughborough with discounted price, but sadly i'd already spent £500 that day! sob sob.

* Juicy Couture Black velour tracksuit top - the one with the logo and emblem sewn into the back of the top in GOLD. SOOO sexy!

Wants:

* Hair cut (it's such a disgrace at the moment, i need to find a GOOD hairdressers - can anyone recommend anyone?)

* Corrine Bailey Rae CD (Isn't her songs just so easy listening)

* Nail manicure (I just need to find the time to get them done!)

* New shoes - preferably some flat slipper shoes, for work!

---Glittery PINK steilettos!!!---(Haven't yet had a chance to get to Moda in Pelle)

*** CRISTAL D'ARQUE PARIS: Longcham Folies Champagne flutes in "flashy" x another 3 more sets!!! ****

I brought a set of 4 yesterday and they are just heavenly! ... Check them out @ http://www.cristaldarquesparis.co.uk/collections-table/longchamp-folies-flashy.html but because they are made in France - i'm not sure where else stock them in the UK - anyone any ideas or seen them!?

...can't actually think of anything else i would like. Just to be surrounded by some of my favourite people would be enough and more over than all of the above anyday!

My favourite auntie is coming over from Hong Kong and she's never been abroad and lived in HK all her life - so i am really excited to be able to spend my brithday with her! Also, that my beloved is giving up a day of hard core revision to spend shopping, dining and cinemaring with me!

Until then i am still 21!

xxx